Fantasy Football Week 3 Recap

Both of my teams now stand at 2-1 as we enter the Bye weeks. The Yahoo team suffered its first defeat while my ESPN team continued its winning ways. Here’s how things went down.

Vancouver Volcanoes (2-1) 134
Virginia Beach Polish Pride (1-2) 108

I had some challenging lineup decisions to make this week, and while my trust in Joe Flacco over Carson Palmer paid off, my flex spot was a much tougher call. Ahmad Bradshaw has been looking solid, but I couldn’t be sure he’d get enough touches. Lee Evans was a tempting matchup with Buffalo sure to be down and throwing a lot. Ultimately, I put my trust in a healthy Pierre Thomas, and though he made me sweat the decision through the first half, he paid off in the second half. While my margin of victory might suggest that any of these guys would have won me the game, I could not afford to take chances against the team that recorded the highest total of the season in Week 2. This week I enter a matchup with the Wyoming Ball-Busters with Michael Turner on my bench and Fred Jackson having his workload potentially cut in half.

PDX Prowlers (2-1) 69
The Pomeranians (2-1) 82

My backfield of Slaton and McFadden continues to disappoint, but Jonathan Stewart isn’t giving me much reason to sit either of them. Though the decision to replace Nate Washington with Chansi Stuckey cost me a little, the blame for this loss can surely be laid at the feet of Drew Brees, whose season-low 172 yards and 1 lost fumble negated fine performances by DeSean Jackson and Vernon Davis. The Pomeranians 3-headed Horse attack of Manning-Wayne-Addai nearly won this matchup on their own. Up next, Orton’s Neckbeard, looking surprisingly loaded for an 0-3 team (even with Steve Smith on a bye.) They’ll try to exploit the Giants matchup against KC while I hope the Texans and Raiders engage in a brutal ground war.

Fantasy Football Week 2 Recap

There were some mind-boggling numbers put up this week by the likes of Chris Johnson, Matt Schaub, Andre Johnson, Dallas Clark and Frank Gore. I don’t have any of these guys on either of my teams, but fortunately, I didn’t have to face them either.  So even though my point totals were down from last week, I came away with two close wins.

Vancouver Volcanoes (1-1) 111
Death By TD (1-1) 95

Michael Turner was back to his expected numbers and Fred Jackson and Chad Ochocinco had great games, more than making up for Reggie Wayne’s disappearing act Monday night. The decision to go with Flacco over Carson Palmer cost me a few points, and Matt Prater’s missed FGs negated the ones he made. Still it was enough as Devin, already burned by the decision to start Nate Burleson over Vincent Jackson, saw all hope for a comeback pull up lame along with Marion Barber. Next up: Virginia Beach Polish Pride, who snagged Team of the Week honors this week thanks to Clark and Andre Johnson.

PDX Prowlers (2-0) 84
Buck an Ears (1-1) 83

Drew Brees’ big numbers and DeSean Jackson’s 71-yard TD catch were the highlights of an otherwise unspectacular effort. Still it looked like I had things sewn up going into Monday night’s game with an 11-point lead. My opponent, perhaps earning his Bort handle “crazylilmofo,” had one more chance to catch up with Pierre Garcon. For nearly 57 minutes, I enjoyed the very strange Colts-Dolphins game without even thinking about the possibility of losing. Then, when Frenchy turned a 2-yard sideline pass into a 48-yard score, my mind started racing. Is this a PPR league? Did he make any plays earlier in the game that I missed? Thankfully, Indy didn’t get the ball back and my lead held up. Despite him not being on my team, my game ball goes to Dallas Clark for crossing midfield before stepping out-of-bounds on the previous play. Next week, the Pomeranians’ Colts-heavy lineup is all that stands between me and a 3-0 record.

Fantasy Football Week 1 Recap

There were outstanding performances on both of my fantasy teams in week 1, but only one of my teams emerged victorious. 

Vancouver Volcanoes (0-1) 129
Couver Crusaders (1-0) 151

Reggie Wayne and John Carlson helped the Volcanoes rack up the highest losing point total in the league. Unfortunately, it was not enough to overcome Danny’s NFFL defending champions, who racked up an incredible 53 points from Philadelphia’s defense alone. Michael Turner was underwhelming and Carson Palmer has earned himself a spot on the bench for week 2. I also missed the news that Steve Breaston would not play, but as it turns out, my other flex options (Lee Evans, Ahmad Bradshaw, Earl Bennett) would not have made a difference. Coming up this Sunday, I face Death By TD, and we’ll see if Devin can dominate the fantasy gridiron like he can the saxophone.

PDX Prowlers (1-0) 102
Der Bluten Kats (0-1) 71

Once again I found myself squaring off against the defending league champions, but this time I had Philly’s defense on my side. Scoring in this league is a bit more conservative, but the combo of the Philly D and Drew Brees helped me rack up the highest point total in the league. DBK’s best performance came from the over-achieving Cedric Benson, while LT’s early exit due to an ankle injury kept him from catching up. Up next are the Buck an Ears, relying heavily on a bounceback performance from Arizona’s potentially lethal combo of Warner and Fitzgerald.

September – It Begins

September always feels like the beginning to me. Sure the calendar turns to a new year in January, and nature springs back to life around April. But once Labor Day has passed, and with it the Summer, new things start happening. Many years ago, that meant school, marching band, and new TV shows. Nowadays, it means a heavier gigging schedule, more new TV shows, and Fantasy Football.

This year I’ve gotten a reasonable handle on my addiction to America’s most counterproductive national pastime. I only signed up for 2 leagues this year, and ended up with two very different teams. I’ve been starved for blog content lately, so I’ve decided to chronicle my teams’ progress here. I’ll introduce the teams and leagues in this post, and post my Week 1 results later today. Each week, I’ll try to post my results by Wednesday and hopefully, this exercise will get my creative juices flowing so I can get back to more compelling subject matter.  

First up, the Vancouver Volcanoes (in draft order):

Hoping for a repeat of last year's dominance (
Hoping for a repeat of last year's dominance (

Michael Turner, RB, Atl
Reggie Wayne, WR, Ind
Pierre Thomas, RB, NO
Chad Ochocinco, WR, Cin
Carson Palmer, QB, Cin
Lee Evans, WR, Buf
Ahmad Bradshaw, RB, NYG
Fred Jackson, RB, Buf
Steve Breaston, WR, Arz
Joe Flacco, QB, Bal
John Carlson, TE, Sea
Redskins DEF, Was
Shonn Greene, RB, NYJ
Earl Bennett, WR, Chi
Colts DEF, Ind
Matt Prater, K, Den
Martellus Bennett, TE, Dal

This is a 14-team head-to-head PPR league run by my drummer buddy Jason on The rest of the owners are his friends and family, some here in Portland and the rest in New Orleans. I had the #4 pick in the draft, which was held at his house on August 23rd. Twelve of the 14 owners were in attendance, which was a first for me, so it was a lot of fun heckling questionable picks and owners who let the clock tick down to :02 before making their pick.

My other league drafted later that night. This is my second year in the Bort league, a 16-team Yahoo league for fellow Umphrey’s McGee fans. This draft was sort of an afterthought, and when I learned I had the 16th pick, I figured I would not get a quality team. I was very pleasantly surprised – here are the results, copied from Yahoo!

PDX Prowlers
1. (16) Drew Brees
2. (17) Steve Slaton
3. (48) T.J. Houshmandzadeh
4. (49) Jonathan Stewart
5. (80) Darren McFadden
6. (81) DeSean Jackson
7. (112) Philadelphia
8. (113) Sammy Morris
9. (144) Nate Washington
10. (145) Vernon Davis
11. (176) Hakeem Nicks
12. (177) Chad Pennington
13. (208) Malcom Floyd
14. (209) Chansi Stuckey
15. (240) Jerramy Stevens
16. (241) Neil Rackers
17. (272) Shaun Suisham


Suisham was an autopick at the end, I have sinced dumped him to add a backup Defense (Houston has a good matchup vs. Oakland on Philly’s Bye Week.) Also unloaded Stevens in order to add James Davis. I should note that this league plays 2 RBs and 3 WRs with no flex position. It will take some solid performances from young players to make this team a winner, but I like my chances. Good luck to all of my leaguemates – have fun!